Sign in / Join
1957

How to compliment a woman without being a condescending jerk

Image: spencer platt/Getty Images

It’s surprising that Donald Trump occasionally fails to properly communicate with women, since we all know that no one respects women more than he does, probably in the entire world.

The president has nonetheless struggled to compliment his fellow female leaders without sounding like he’s flirting with the Friday night hostess at Cheesecake Factory. And listen, we get it: it must be hard to talk for a powerful man like Mr. Trump to talk to women without degrading himself and over 50 percent of the population.

That’s why we’ve come up with a list of tips that will hopefully aid President Trump and men like him to talk to women like they’re real humans with operational brains and feelings.

I know, it may seem impossible. But all Trump has to do is tweak his language *just slightly* and step down from the Oval Office *in the next 10 minutes* to restore his reputation as the most respectful man in the world!

Here’s some hints for Trump and all of the struggling men out there:

1. Instead of this: "We have all of this Irish, beautiful Irish press here," and "has a nice smile on her face so I bet she treats you well."

Try this: "She is doing a good job."

2. Replace this: "You’re in such good shape. She’s in such good physical shape. Beautiful."

With this: "It is nice to meet you."

Trump tells the First Lady of France, Brigitte Macron: “You’re in such good shape … beautiful”pic.twitter.com/tKCzX15cPl

— Bradd Jaffy (@BraddJaffy) July 13, 2017

3. Don’t greet women like this:

Here’s that awkward handshake between Trump and France’s Brigitte Macron. pic.twitter.com/5Ci6lAWuV6

— Meg Wagner (@megwagner) July 13, 2017

Do it like this:

4. Compliments like this: "I’ve said that if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her."

Should be modified to say this: "I believe I need professional help."

5. In lieu of this: "It’s funny: One of the best chemistries I had was with Merkel."

Do this: "I enjoy working with the Chancellor."

6. Instead of this: "She’s really a nice person. She’s gotten a little bit large. I don’t think you should dress like you weigh 120 pounds."

Edit it down slightly: "She’s really a nice person."

7. Not this: "I love her upper body. I think her skin is beautiful. I’ve seen her many times … She’s got beautiful skin."

This: "She seems like a nice person. I do not understand my relationship with skin."

8. And when you feel like saying this: "You’re looking kind of hot today, I love that dress on you," and then turning to one of your coworkers to say, "Wouldn’t you sleep with her?"

Say this instead: "I am not fit to be President of the United States. Thank you for your time."